today these two kids in my math class were hitting each other with pencils and my teacher glared at them and said “could you try to be a little more mature?”
one of them screamed “TAXES” and punched the other kid in the face
(via iamsogrilledchicken)
I feel like dirt and definitely want to sleep.
homosexuality is not a choice because hulk hogan gave me my first boner and nobody would choose that
(Source: beyonceburgers, via ms-demeanor)
gettingcrazywiththecheezewhiz:
Shoutout to people who can’t hear too well
what
they said “SHOUT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO CAN’T HEAR TOO WELL”
SAUERKRAUT FOR PEOPLE WHO HAVE NONE TO SELL?
MA THEY’RE SELLING CHOCOLATE
WHAT ARE THEY SELLING
CHOCOLATES.
(Source: polyandthenomials, via ms-demeanor)
*subtle hints of self hatred in everything i say*
(via ms-demeanor)
people my age are getting pregnant and married and i can’t even order a pizza over the phone
(Source: eleanorjanestyle, via ms-demeanor)
blaze it, i whisper as i light my homework on fire
(via 1ntentions)
how to protect yourself from someone trying to rob you
- look them in the eyes and tell them you know their father was never there for them
- share an emotional hug
- during the emotional hug reach into their back pocket and take their wallet haha trolled
(via ms-demeanor)
